Brett.Ullman

Category - Uncategorized

A Cure for Disconnection

Great thoughts on Loneliness here. Well worth the read.

This is why traditional efforts to reach out to the lonely—by, say, visiting a nursing home—are often unsuccessful: They fail to foster deep, meaningful engagement. The encounter is pleasant but fleeting, and the effects don’t last. “If I talk to someone for an hour and then leave, they’re still lonely,” says Dutch sociologist Jenny Gierveld, who has spent 50 years studying loneliness. “The basis of a meaningful bond is reciprocity. A lonely person can’t just answer a lot of questions for an hour and feel connected. He or she has to do something.”


Click here for the entire article.

Brett Ullman: Presentations -The Walking Wounded

As I enter my 20th year speaking I thought I would take some time over the next week to go over each of the talks that I have. My talks are heavily researched and I am updating my talks all the time.

Talk title: The Walking Wounded

Why would you bring me into your church, school or conference to speak this talk? – Of all the talks that I do this seems to be talk that people ask for the most. I find in our church world we do not have a good theology of suffering or even a decent practical application for how Christians should deal with mental health struggles. In this talk I answer a simple question. What do you do if someone walks up to you and says “I am struggling with anxiety or depression?” We must be prepared to have a Biblical yet practical response to this. In this talk, I will walk through what to do if you are struggling or if people you love are struggling.

Talk Description:

Life is good … until it’s not.

Dark clouds come in all shapes and sizes and leave us asking where do we turn? Some of us struggle with mental health: anxiety, depression etc. Some of our struggles come from coping with tough situations in life by Self Injuring: eating disorders, suicide, self-harm and drug and alcohol use.

When we are surrounded by these heightened emotions and feelings life becomes one that is isolated from others and we begin to be full of questions instead of answers and we do not know what will work, or where to turn.

How do we begin our journey towards hope, healing, redemption, rescue, and a restoration to wholeness?
Where and when does our journey back to life begin again?
As a Follower of the Way (A Christian) What about our faith? How does our faith fit into our healing journey?

This talk has no cliches, no Christianese and does not put forward promises of false hope.

Brett Ullman in The Walking Wounded begins to address how to walk back towards healing and away from our emotions, feelings and thoughts and that are keeping us paralyzed in life.

No shame, fear, or hiding is required as we are safe to journey towards healing together.
There is Hope for the Walking Wounded.

Promotional Trailer:

One of my favourite times to do this talk is a Sunday Morning church service. I call it “Care Sunday” I do my talk for the morning service and after the service one of the pastors talks about all the ways that your church “cares” Some churches put out booths in the foyer with counsellors, prayer teams, speciality groups like grief care, Celebration recovery and any other ways your church supports people who struggle with mental health.

You can make your church a relevant, accepting place for those who struggle with mental health, or who have a loved one who is mentally ill, by talking about it.” Leadership Journal

If you would like more information or would like to book me for a talk please email me at brett@brettullman.com.

Thanks… and looking forward

Thank You!

As we head into the Christmas season I want to say a huge thank you to a few groups of people:

  1. Thank you to the people who booked me to speak in your churches, schools, camps and conferences. I so appreciate the opportunity to share my talks with your people. I am honoured that I have been able to be speaking for 19 years.
  2. Thank you to my monthly and yearly donors. You are the backbone behind this ministry and I thank you so much for your continued support.
  3. Thank you to the people who purchased my books, DVD’s and online presentations. I hope these products help support you in your families, churches and schools. The proceeds of all purchases go directly back into the work at the charity.
  4. Thank you for the people who have prayed for my speaking dates, my health, my family and the work that I do at Worlds Apart.
  5. Thank you to my Board of Directors at Worlds Apart, accountant, web designers, consultants and people who have helped me run my resource table at countless events.
  6. Thank you to my wife Dawn and my children Zoe and Ben for their support in the work that I do and the understanding for the time that I spend away from them.

In 2016:

  1. I was able to film my talk called the.sex.talk which is now used by parents across the country to begin to help their kids get a Biblical worldview of healthy sexuality.
    Digital copy – https://vimeo.com/ondemand/thesextalk
    DVD – Click Here!
  2. I put a new online course together called Truth Tellers which is everything I have learned in the past 19 years as a speaker.
    Truth Tellers Course – Click Here!
  3.  I have also filmed my dating.for.life: the questions talk into an online course hoping that youth groups can use this in their small groups.
    Dating.for.life: the questions CourseClick Here!

Looking forward into 2017:

  1. This winter I will be speaking across Canada with World Vision. Please check out the tour dates page for all of the speaking dates.
  2. Always looking forward to the many churches, camps, schools and conferences that I get a chance to speak in each year.
  3. I hope to film my media.faith.culture Parents 101 talk onto a online course that can be used by parents to help their kids connect their faith with the culture around us.
  4. We are going to add a new online poll to our existing polling on pornography (http://stats.worldsapart.org/) and will begin polling as well on questions of faith.

Where we need help in 2017:

  1. I am hoping to finish the fundraising to film my talk “The Porn Project”. This talk will help students, parents and leaders in this tough conversation on pornography. ($5500)
  2. I am also hoping to film my new talk on dating called “dating.for.life: the questions”. ($7500)
  3. We are in need to upgrade my computers. My present laptop is from 2011 and my desktop is in need of an upgrade as well. ($4000)
  4. I would love to grow our monthly donors by about 50 people at $10 a month.

If you would like to donate you can send a cheque to Worlds Apart (68 Ashbury Blvd, Ajax, Ontario, L1Z1M8) or donate online (one time or monthly) by clicking here. Thanks for your support

If you have any questions please send me an email or a message on social media.

Thanks again and I hope you all have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Teaching Men to Be Emotionally Honest

I had this article sent to me today (Thanks Joanna la Fleur). It is a long but worthwhile read talking about men today. So much great stuff in this article. Please take the few minutes to read it. Love to hear from men their thoughts on this.

By the time many young men do reach college, a deep-seated gender stereotype has taken root that feeds into the stories they have heard about themselves as learners. Better to earn your Man Card than to succeed like a girl, all in the name of constantly having to prove an identity to yourself and others.

I wanted the course to explore this hallmark of the masculine psyche — the shame over feeling any sadness, despair or strong emotion other than anger, let alone expressing it and the resulting alienation. Many young men, just like this student, compose artful, convincing masks, but deep down they aren’t who they pretend to be.

But wouldn’t encouraging men to embrace the full range of their humanity benefit women? Why do we continue to limit the emotional lives of males when it serves no one?

Click here for the entire article.

The Case for the.Sex.Talk

It was 1996 in Pickering, Ontario – in a Church room full of high school students – I delivered my first talk ever. I talked about music & media and how our faith plays a role in this. 10 years later I found myself speaking 45 times per year while still teaching full-time with the Toronto District School Board. I left teaching that year and have been speaking full-time with Worlds Apart ever since.

In his book “Holy Discontent”, Bill Hybels talks about how everyone needs to find his/her “Holy Discontent” (those things that continuously bother you) and to walk into that space. That has been the theme for all of my talks for 19 years. Every few years I would add a talk which now has grown into Self Harm, Dating, Men, Sex, Mental Health and most recently Pornography.

Last year we had the chance to film my talk called the “Walking Wounded” which talks about a Christian view towards people struggling with mental health issues. How can we have a Biblical yet utterly practical response to those of us struggling with all forms of mental health?

At this time, I am looking at filming “the.sex.talk”:

Why: Present day statistics show that 70-80% of young Christians adults have had sex before they got married. This means that we need to rethink completely how we engage students in this conversation from a standpoint of parents, youth groups and the greater Christian community. What a tough time to grow up being a teenager. So many questions and so little answers from parents and the Christian Community. We cannot continue to be silent on these issues of sexuality.

How: “the.sex.talk” helps lay the foundation–equips and empowers parents in how to help their kids get a Biblical worldview of healthy Sexuality. I usually say the talk help kids get a Biblical Sexual Ethic. It goes through all of the areas we need to talk about to begin this conversation in our homes. We must break the cycle of failure by addressing head on these conversations.

Goal: The goal of this project is that through this talk it will help create a culture where Christian parents and their teenagers are equipped and empowered to have this conversation–resulting in better and healthier choices in the area of sex for their teenagers.

It was a few years ago that I began to hear from parents about these growing struggles. With society around us growing ever so sexualized how were parents to respond. More recently the Ontario government came out with a new Health Curriculum with a ton of new material on sex. Hundreds of letters flooded in to me asking for help.

“What is a Christian parent to do with the new sex education curriculum?”
Parent in Toronto

I was being asked to come into churches and schools to speak to parents about the new curriculum. I would always push back a bit and say that we as Christians are not against sex education. We must as parents have these tough conversations with our kids. Many parents would say to me that they don’t even know where to start. I have taken the past year to create a talk for Parents I am calling “The Sex Talk: Parents and Leaders”. It is a talk to help empower and equip parents in the areas of helping our kids create a sexual ethic (connect their faith with the area of sex).

“How do I actually teach my kids to have a Biblical view of sex? Where do I start?”
– email from parent of teen –

As a speaker I am able to speak about 100-125 times a year. I am unable to speak at every church and school in the country. My last filmed talk “The Wounding Embrace” is being used in churches from California to England, from Vancouver to St. Johns. I receive emails from people using the DVD or Digital download to help equip people in their churches to help people with mental health struggles. I feel now is the time to film the Sex and the Porn talk.

Ask:  I would like to start by filming the sex talk. We have raised about $7,000 for this project already but need to raise the remaining $6,000.

  • $8,000 – for filming and editing of the talk. It is the editing of the talk that is very time consuming as we need to incorporate a professionally designed Keynote presentation throughout the filmed talk. It gives people the same experience as if I was speaking live at their church or school.
  • $2,500 – Trailer for promotion
  • $1,000 – Creating Master copy of DVD, Creation of Graphics for DVD jacket and cover.
  • $1,500 – printing of 1500 DVD’s. The Talk is also put online on VimeoOnDemand.com
  • Total funds – $13,000

This talk would help parents and students with a framework for how to have a Biblical Worldview in these areas. Due to the growing importance and requests for this talk–I can’t physically deliver it in person to all those who need to hear it but by filming the talkimagine the local, national and international impact it will have on our teens.

It is hard to raise funds for a small non for profit. We are cut out of applying for most grants from foundations as we don’t reach their $250k minimum income. As a charity that has been around for almost 19 years we are not looking at raising funds for day to day operations but raising the funds specifically for this project. I presently speak over 100-125 talks a year that pay for all of the overhead costs of running Worlds Apart (office, equipment, salary etc.)

If you would like to chat more please contact me at the email below. If you would like to make a donation please follow this link – https://www.canadahelps.org/dn/15850

Thanks for your consideration.
Brett Ullman
Executive Director of Worlds Apart (worldsapart.org)

Contact:
brett@brettullman.com
brettullman.com
905.626.4297

 

 

Summer 2015: Unplugging. Want to join me?

Life is busy. For many of us too busy.

I would like to ask to see if anyone wants to join me in a 2 week (the longest I have ever done) fast from social media.  From 6:00pm Friday August 7th until 6pm Friday August 21st.

I will also be taking a break from posting any blogs for 2 weeks. I have posted 238 blogs since the blog went live back in the Fall of 2014. It’s time for a little break.

Anyway, if you are interested in joining me in this 2 week break just reply to the blog or the post on social media. It might be fun afterwards to let people know how it went. I know for me it is tough for the first 4-5 days.

See you in 2 weeks 🙂