men… watching your kids and doing chores is not heroic or exceptional

This video is a short challenge (rant) against some of the language we use for fathers and husbands in our society today. I want to help men be better fathers and husbands and some of the language we use makes basic things men do seem heroic or even exceptional when they are just part of normal life. If you see a woman at the mall with her kids you would never say – “I see you are babysitting”. She is a mom she is with her kids. Dads if you are with your kids you are … with your kids. Not babysitting your wife’s kids. We need to not put men on a pedestal for doing basic normal things around the house. These things are not heroic.

* It is not exceptional when a man does dishes or vacuums the house

* It is not exceptional when a dad goes grocery shopping

* It is not exceptional when a dad watches his kids for a night. You are also not giving mom a break. Why are we assuming the mom is the primary caregiver and we are there assistant.

* It is not exceptional when a dad fills in school forms or writing notes to the kid’s teachers (when they are young)

* There is nothing heroic about taking your kids on a bike ride or to the park.

* We are not doing our wife a favour when we do the laundry. These are all great things. But, this is called being a parent, a husband, and part of a functioning household

We are not helpers in our marriages. We are a partner in our marriages

We are not assistants in parenting, we are parents.

So I guess there are 2 things here

1. We need to make sure we are not perpetuating language like this in our marriages and when we talk to others.

2. We as men need to make sure we are not helpers and assistants in our homes. If you are … step-up and change this.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this.

About The Author

Brett Ullman

Brett Ullman travels North America speaking to teens, young adults, leaders, and parents on topics including parenting, mental health, sexuality, pornography, men, dating and media. Brett's seminars engage and challenge attendees to try and connect our ancient faith with our modern culture we live in. Participants are inspired to reflect on what we know, what we believe and how our faith ought to serve as the lens through which we view and engage tough conversations in our society today.

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