Brett.Ullman

Tag - leadership

Do You Feel Lonely As A Leader? Study Says You’re Not Alone.

Interesting stats on loneliness as a leader. Worth the time to read.

The authors cited survey findings that “half of CEOs report experiencing feelings of loneliness in their role, and of this group, 61 percent believe it hinders their performance. First-time CEOs are particularly susceptible to this isolation. Nearly 70 percent of first-time CEOs who experience loneliness report that the feelings negatively affect their performance.”

Your first reaction may be: cry me a river.

Corporate CEO behavior and lavish salaries haven’t exactly instilled empathy. Should we care if billionaires like Mark Zuckerberg or Jeff Bezos aren’t reaching the top of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs?

I would argue, any leader’s isolation has negative ramifications on others. And it’s not just CEOs who experience this kind of loneliness — it’s team managers, entrepreneurs, and community leaders too. In fact, anyone who finds themselves peerless can feel isolated. This isn’t good for decision-making, culture, or performance.

Click here for the entire article.

’13 Reasons Why’ holds many important lessons for parents of teenagers

As a full time speaker who spends 1/2 of his life speaking to high school age students I think this article is a great wake up call for parents. I find that many students today seem to be raising themselves with parents who are so busy with the downward spiral of their own lives that they have little time / capacity left to be actual parents to their own children.

Successfully parenting today’s teens requires close supervision, effective limit-setting and SM monitoring. Identifying symptoms of anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder and suicidal thoughts is imperative for early intervention and improved outcomes. But what is most important for parents — and lacking in 13 Reasons Why — is curiosity. Curiosity about teens’ friends, hobbies, homework or hairstyle choices. Parents too often dismiss their teens’ emotions as entitled, or their school-related struggles as trite, which leads to a feeling among teens that they are misunderstood and alone. But adolescence isn’t trite. High school experiences and the decisions made during those formative years shape teens’ mental and emotional development for life.

Please take a few minutes to read this article.

Click here for the entire article.

Scissors + Glue || Church

Scissors + Glue is a documentary series exploring the narrative of millennial faith. Our second film focuses on Millennials’ experience in the Church, with the goal of creating dialogue about following Jesus.

“What Millennials need is dialogue… “

Love to hear peoples thoughts on this.

Busy is the New Stupid

Great article. Be present in the moment.

I’ve found that the most productive and successful people I’ve ever met are busy, but you wouldn’t know it.  They find time that others don’t.  And while you may not get much of their time, when you do you get undivided attention. They are fully present and maximize every moment of the interaction. No multi-tasking because that’s as bad as blowing you off all together.

Being busy makes us hurried, creates short-sightedness, expands blind spots, increases careless mistakes and results in missed opportunities that we can’t get back. Busyness creates more woulda, coulda and shoulda than anything else in our life – which ultimately leads to regret.  And regret sucks.

Click here for the entire article.

How to raise emotionally healthy boys

Some great stuff here to help parents of boys.

The only tip father’s need is … be present. Michael Reist

Feminism has done a lot to pave the way for each new generation of women, but as barriers continue to be broken down for girls, are we forgetting about the boys? Michael Reist, author and teacher, thinks young males could use a bit more of our attention if they’re going to grow into emotionally healthy men.

Click here for the video.

War on Boys

Very interesting conversation.

I began thinking of this at my daughters Grade 8 Graduation back in June. I would say that 90% of the awards went to Grade 8 girls. There were some guys who got awards for Athletics. There were (if I remember correct) 2 boys who got Academic awards. The rest of the awards went to girls. I don’t think any boys got Citizenship or Arts awards at all. Check out this video. Love to hear peoples thoughts on this.

What ever happened to letting “boys be boys?” Take these two cases: In one, a seven-year-old boy was sent home for nibbling a Pop Tart into a gun. In another, a teacher was so alarmed by a picture drawn by a student (of a sword fight), that the boy’s parents were summoned in for a conference. In short, boys in America’s schools are routinely punished for being active, competitive, and restless. In other words, boys can no longer be boys. Christina Hoff Sommers, a scholar at the American Enterprise Institute, explains how we can change this.

 

What is Spiritual Abuse?

Great conversation here. It adds some definitions to a term we often throw around these days in our church community.

What is Spiritual Abuse?

Spiritual abuse has been defined in a somewhat nebulous way. The term has been (over)used to cover any abuse that happens within the parameters of a church or ministry. Thus Christians tend to be defensive when spiritual abuse is mentioned.

Abuse, by definition is:

  • to use wrongly or improperly; misuse
  • to treat in a harmful, injurious, or offensive way
  • to speak insultingly, harshly, and unjustly to or about; revile; malign
  • to commit sexual assault upon.

Click here for the rest of the Article.

Worlds Apart: Pornography polling results of Canadian Christians

Last year I got a grant to put up a site to begin to poll Canadian Christians on different topics (click here for poll & look for “Survey Project”). For the first year I decided to poll people on the topic of pornography as I had a new talk on this topic called The Porn Project. We have been polling people for around 6 months and I thought I would release the current statistics. I think that the stats show what we already know about our Christian community: many of us are struggling with pornography. At the time of this blog there have been 532 people polled from nearly every Province in Canada and from over 20 denominations.

I you want to take the poll please click here http://stats.worldsapart.org/

Note: I am not a statistician. I had help designing the questions from a number of counsellors, sex therapists and statistics majors from a few Universities. The goal of this ongoing survey is to help identify areas that we (as parents, christian leaders and pastors) might need to address in our homes and churches.

Below are some of the questions from the survey.

Question #2: What is your gender?

PP Question 2

Question #3: What is your age?

Question 3

 

Question #6: How often would you view pornography

36% I don’t watch pornography
10% Daily
16% Weekly
14% Few times a month
11% Monthly
13% Yearly

Question 6

Question #7: Do you think you have an addiction to Pornography?
Takeaway: Roughly 25% of our Christian Community is saying they think they have an addiction to pornography. This is just addiction not people who struggle or dabble in this issue.

Question 7

Question #10: My current church does an adequate job addressing this issue.
Takeaway: For people in leadership over 50% of people polled say that their church is not addressing the issue of pornography. How can we do a better job at this?

Question 10

Question #12: Would you feel comfortable approaching any member of your current church leadership for support if you are struggling with pornography use?
Takeaway: If you are in a position of church leadership how might your congregation respond to this? Do you address this issue with a conversation of shame and guilt or freedom and grace? Are we helping empower and equip people to deal with pornography in our own lives as well as in the lives of our children?

question 12

Question #13: Did you parents ever openly talk about pornography in your home?
Takeaway: 89% of people say that their parents did not. We as parents need to step up and have these tough conversations on our homes even if it makes us very uncomfortable.

Question 13

 

So where do we go from here?

The way to make your church a relevant, accepting place for those people struggling with pornography is to talk openly about these conversations from the pulpit and in all other areas.

In my talk The Porn Project I have tons of great resources for you. Click here for the resources.

If you would like to poll your church, youth group, camp etc on the topic of pornography I can give you a link specific to your group for this. You then just send around the link and all the data is collected from your group. If you are interested send me a message.

If you have any any links or resources I am missing please let me know.

10 Things Our Kids Shouldn’t Learn at Church

I am usually not a big fan of the “lists of things you should do” posts but this one is fantastic. My favourite is #3

3. To confuse preferences with doctrine

Music is a preference, not a biblical doctrine. The style of the way a church functions is a preference, not a biblical doctrine. The message is our purpose. The method is the means by which we share our message. The message can never change, but the methods should consistently be changing as our culture changes if we are going to meet people where they are and reach reach them for Christ. (Matthew 23:23-24)

Click here for the entire article.